E You want a guy that's sweet C#m A guy that's tough C#m A A feminist who likes to pay for stuff The kinda guy that gets along with your friends B Without being attracted to any of them E C#m A good boy, a bad boy, a good bad boy A half good half bad half boy A Loves your brother sensitive but not weak and B Is a great lover calls your mother on the weekend E A B C#m A Then you might think that this guy only exists in your mind E Well guess what B You're right [Chorus] E C#m A If you want love B E C#m Lower your expectations a few A B Cause Prince Charming would never settle for you E C#m A If you want love B E Just pick a guy and love him C#m A And if he's got a thing for feet B Say fuck it, sweep me off them [Verse] E You want a girl that's nice C#m A girl that's not C#m A Obsessed with her looks but is insanely hot The kinda girl that you can show to your folks B Loves the movies that you like and always laughs at your jokes E C#m A real girl, a hot girl, a really hot girl A brand new really hot real doll A Wants to impress you doesn't care if you notice B And only ever uses you to tickle her throat with E A E B C#m A Then you might think that this girl only exists in your mind E She's real B But last week She died [Chorus] E C#m A If you want love B E C#m Lower your expectations a lot A B You might think your dick is a gift I promise it's not E C#m A If you want love B E Just pick a girl and love her C#m Then whip out your dick and let the A B Girl you love decline the offer A E B I don't want a neat freak I don't want a slob B A Or somebody with bedhead and a dead-end job E B Cause I won't settle for less B Than perfect A E B We want perfect children, a perfect life B A Perfect husband or a perfect wife A E B But deep down we know C#m We don't deserve it [Mute] But E C#m A We all deserve love B E C#m Even on the days when we aren't our best A Cause we all suck B But love can make us suck less E C#m A We all deserve love B E C#m It's the very best part of being alive A And I would know B E I'm almost twenty five