Do you ever think about what a lovely place the world would be without all the people that make life so unpleasant? All the small, petty people All the ugly, annoying people It's hard not to think about it I like to think about what could be done to these people Something cruel Something mean Something just But the meaner the better Goodness knows they deserve it Have you ever dreamed of killing all the stupid people? Not just the unintelligent people but the sort that don't know anything about anything but seem to have opinions about everything They're only too ready to offer their advice about how to run your life And yet look at how they run their own lives For the most part they've accomplished nothing They've contributed nothing Their lives are miserable But they talk, talk, talk At the very least their tongues should be cut out At the very least Do you ever wanna kill all the people who tell lies? Some certainly deserve it Not necessarily the big liers or even those who teach lies as truth I'm talking about people who say one thing and do another or who tell you they sent something express mail when you know they haven't Did you ever want to kill all the slow people in the world? The people who are in front of you when they should be behind you A crime that the swift should be help back by the slow And it's criminal that nothing is going to rectify it And what about all the really ugly people? Add them to the list as well Some people try not to think about life's ugliness I've thought about it I've thought about it quite a lot Something should be done to these people Something to make them suffer the way they've made us suffer I say, bring back the circus maximus for starters Unless these weeds are dealt with they'll poison everything They are poisoning everything We need a gardener A brutal gardener A thorough, thoughtful gardener An iron gardener Whatever happened to Vlad the Impaler? Where's Genghis Kahn when you need him? Or Roy D. Ayatollah Khomeini Adolf Hitler Benito Mussolini Nero Diocletian Kitchner Come back!