The Real Slim Shady

Eminem

Am
123
X02210
B7
1234
X21202
Em
12
022000
Tom: G
[Verso 1]

   Em                         Am
Y'all act like you never seen a 
white person before
      B7                          
Jaws all on the floor like Pam and 
Em
Tommy just burst in the door
Em                         Am
and started whoopin her ass worse 
than before
          B7                     
they were first divorced, throwin 
  Em
her over furniture (Ahh!)
Em                              
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait,
Am
 no way, you're kidding,
B7                          Em
he didn't just say what I think he 
did, did he?"
Em                 Am
And Dr. Dre said... nothing you 
idiots!
B7                   Em
Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my 
basement! (Ha-ha!)
Em                    Am
Feminist women love Eminem
                B7
chigga chigga chigga
                   Em
"Slim Shady, I'm sick of him look at
 him,
Em                    Am
Walkin' around grabbin' his 
you-know-what
              B7                 
Flippin the you-know-who," "Yeah, 
          Em
but he's so cute though!"
Em                             
Yeah, I probably got a couple of 
      Am
screws up in my head loose
     B7                         Em
But no worse, than what's goin on in
 your parents' bedrooms
Em                      Am       
Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and 
                         B7
just let loose, but can't
                               Em
but it's cool for Tom Green to hump 
a dead moose
Em                          Am
"My bum is on your lips, my bum is 
on your lips"
       B7                       
And if I'm lucky, you might just 
   Em
give it a little kiss
     Em                       
And that's the message that we 
     Am
deliver to little kids
     B7                            
And expect them not to know what a 
  Em
woman's clitoris is
     Em                       
Of course they gonna know what 
        Am
intercourse is
                      B7
By the time they hit fourth grade
                Em
They got the Discovery Channel don't
 they?
Em                      Am       
"We ain't nothing but mammals.." 
                     B7
Well, some of us cannibals
               Em
who cut other people open like 
cantaloupes [SLURP]
Em                   Am
But if we can hump dead animals and 
antelopes
B7 then there's no reason that a man Em and another man can't elope Em [*EWWW!*] But if you feel like I Am feel, I got the antidote B7 Em Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes [Refrão: Eminem (repete x2)] Em Am 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady B7 Em All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating Em Am So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up, B7 Em please stand up, please stand up? Em Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his Am raps to sell his records; B7 Em well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too! Em You think I give a damn about a Am Grammy? B7 Half of you critics can't even Em stomach me, let alone stand me Em Am "But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?" B7 Why? So you guys could just lie to Em get me here? Em Am So you can, sit me here next to Britney Spears? B7 Em Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs Em Am so I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst B7 and hear 'em argue over who she Em gave head to first Em Am You little bitch, put me on blast on MTV B7 "Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's Em married to Kim, hee-hee!" Em Am I should download her audio on MP3 B7 and show the whole world how you Em gave Eminem VD [AHHH!] Em I'm sick of you little girl and Am B7 boy groups, all you do is annoy me Em so I have been sent here to destroy you [bzzzt] Em Am And there's a million of us just like me B7 who cuss like me; who just don't Em give a fuck like me Em who dress like me; walk, talk and Am act like me B7 and just might be the next best Em thing but not quite me! [Refrão] Em I'm like a head trip to listen to, Am cause I'm only givin you B7 things you joke about with your Em friends inside your living room Em Am The only difference is I got the balls to say it B7 in front of y'all and I don't gotta Em be false or sugarcoated at all Em Am I just get on the mic and spit it B7 and whether you like to admit it Em [*ERR*] I just shit it Em better than ninety percent of you Am rappers out can B7 Then you wonder how can kids eat up Em these albums like valiums Em Am It's funny; cause at the rate I'm goin when I'm thirty B7 I'll be the only person in the Em nursin home flirting Em Am Pinchin nurses asses when I'm jackin off with Jergens B7 And I'm jerkin but this whole bag Em of Viagra isn't working Em Am And every single person is a Slim Shady lurkin B7 He could be workin at Burger King, Em spittin on your onion rings Em [*HACH*] Or in the parkin lot, Am circling B7 Screaming "I don't give a fuck!" Em with his windows down and his system up Em Am So, will the real Shady please stand up? B7 And put one of those fingers on each Em hand up? Em Am And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control B7 Em and one more time, loud as you can, how does it go? [Refrão] Ha ha Guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us Fuck it, let's all stand up
Composição: Andre Young / Marshall Mathers / Mike Elizondo / Tom Coster, Jr.Colaboração e revisão: Pedro Rodrigues