The trouble with the world today it seems to me
Is coffee in a cardboard cup
The trouble with the affluent society
Is coffee in a cardboard cup

No one's ever casual and nonchalant
No one wastes a minute in a restaurant
No one wants a waitress passing pleasantries
Like "Hiya miss"
"Hiya sir"
"May I take your order please"

The trouble with the world today is plain to see
Is everything is hurry up
It's "rush it through"
"Don't be slow"
"BLT on rye to go"
And coffee
I think she said 'coffee'
I know she said 'coffee
In a cardboard cup'

The trouble with the helter skelter life we lead
Is coffee in a cardboard cup
The trouble the psychologists have all agreed
Is coffee in a cardboard cup

Tell me what could possibly be drearier
Than seaboard from the Belnord cafeteria
Seems to me a gentleman would much prefer
An "afternoon, how you been
Would you like the special sir?"

The trouble with the world today is plain to se
Is everything is hurry up
There's Reddi Whip
Instant tea
Minute rice and my oh me
There's coffee
I think she said 'coffee'
I know she said 'coffee
In a cardboard cup'

The trouble with the world today beyond a doubt
Is coffee in a cardboard cup
The trouble is the way we like to take things out
Like coffee in a cardboard cup

No one knows the meaning of utopia
Is dining at your coner cornucopia
Seems to me we wouldn't be such nervous wrecks
With 'hello there, be right back
Would you care for separate checks'

The trouble with the world today is plain to see
Is everything is hurry up
It's all become Looney Tunes
With sugar packs and plastic spoons
And coffee
I think she said 'coffee'
I know she said 'coffee'
I'm sure she said 'coffee
In a cardboard cup'

(spoken): "Hurry up!"