Me holidays on the Southern Sands, trying to get some fun by way of one night stands... I clocked this girl, thought l'd give her the chat - one of them Swedish blonde types, and l've always fancied that. I showed her me Polaroid. She said "I like it, will you please take my picture?" I say "Right then", thinking this is gonna be me lucky day. She whips off her bikini top and I think "OK!" I say "It only takes a minute for this thing to develop." She says "I'd better push off now or me feller'll be jealous." Just then I felt a hand on me collar, and it was a Boy in Blue. He says "You can't take nude photographs on this beach," and "I'm arresting you." I protested me innocence, but it was no use, the picture was forming; he gave me the official warning that day. He'd seen me Polaroid, so what could I say? I got me Polaroid She got away. I looked around, but she'd disappeared, I say "You don't understand, this was all her idea" but the copper says "Don't worry son, I get the picture OK." He took me Polaroid and I got ten days.