[MISS ANDREW] These children have been spoiled I've arrived here just in time By chance I've brought the punishment That best befits the crime Brimstone and treacle and cod liver oil Liberal doses of each These are the treats from which children recoil The lessons I'm going to teach Just follow my model And don't molly-coddle It may lead the irksome to irk So seek satisfaction From punitive action Brimestone and treacle will work Open! [MICHAEL] Does it taste as bad as it smells? [MISS ANDREW] Worse. [MICHAEL] Do I have to? [MISS ANDREW] Open! Brimstone and treacle and carbolic soap These are the tools of my trade With spoonfuls of sugar you don't have a hope Of seeing that changes are made Where manners are chronic My tincture's the tonic That's certain to wipe off a smirk Just pour out a ration In matronly fashion Brimstone and treacle will work I won't stand for simpering, whinging and whimpering Sucking of thumbs is absurd Observe every letter for children are better When they can be seen and not heard Your son will go to boarding school at once. As for the girl, I shall take charge of her myself. To cosset and pamper Will hinder and hamper The child in whom bad habits lurk First threaten to throttle Then uncork the bottle Brimstone and treacle will work Brimstone and treacle will work