I like glitter and sparkly dresses But I'm not gonna talk about that In my monologue I like baking and things that smell like winter But I'm not gonna talk about that In my monologue La la la La la la I like writing songs about douchebags who cheat on me But I'm not gonna say that In my monologue I like writing their names into songs so they're ashamed to go in public But I'm not gonna say that In my monologue La la la la la la la This is my musical monologue You might think I'd bring up Joe That guy who broke up with me on the phone But I'm not gonna mention him In my monologue Hey Joe, I'm doin' real well Tonight I'm hosting SNL But I'm not gonna brag about that In my monologue La la la Ha ha ha Ha ha ha Ha ha ha La la la And if you're wondering I might be dating the werewolf from Twilight Hi, Taylor! I'm not gonna comment on that in my monologue La la la la la la la This is my musical monologue! You might expect me to say, something bad about Kanye And how he ran up on the stage and ruined my VMA monologue But there's nothing more to say 'cause everything's okay I've got security lignting the stage! It's my SNL monologue La la la la la la la This is, my SNL monologue La la la la la la la That was my SNL monologue!