Smut! Give me smut and nothing but! A dirty novel I can't shut If it's uncut And unsubtle I've never quibbled If it was ribald I would devour where others merely nibbled As the judge remarked the day that he Acquitted my Aunt Hortense To be smut It must be utterly without redeeming social importance Por- Nographic pictures I adore Indecent magazines galore I like them more If they're hardcore Bring on the obscene movies, magazines Murals, newspapers, postcards, neckties Samplers, stained-glass windows, tattoos, anything! More, more, I'm still not satisfied! Stories of tortures Used by debauchers Lurid, licentious, and vile Make me smile Novels that pander To my taste for candor Give me a pleasure sublime (Let's face it, I love slime) All books can be indecent books Though recent books are bolder For filth (I'm glad to say) is in The mind of the beholder When correctly viewed Everything is lewd (I could tell you things about Peter Pan) (And the Wizard of Oz, there's a dirty old man!) I thrill To any book like Fanny Hill And I suppose I always will If it is swill And really fil-thy Who needs a hobby like tennis or philately? I've got a hobby: Rereading Lady Chatterley But now they're trying to take it all Away from us unless We take a stand, and hand in hand We fight for freedom of the press In other words Smut! (I love it) Ah, the adventures of a slut Oh, I'm a market they can't glut I don't know what Compares with smut Hip hip hooray! Let's hear it for the Supreme Court! Don't let them take it away!