[VAL]
Dance: Ten
Looks: Three
And I' still on unemployment
Dancing for my own enjoyment
That ain't it, kid. That ain't it, kid

Dance: Ten; Looks; three
I like to die!
Left the theatre and
Called the doctor for
My appointment to buy

Tits and ass
Bought myself a fancy pair
Tightened up the derriere
Did the nose with it
All that goes with it

Tits and ass!
Had the bingo-bongos done
Suddenly I'm getting nash'nal tours!
Tits and ass won't get you jobs
Unless they're yours

Didn't cost a fortune neither
Didn't hurt my sex life either

Flat and sassy
I would get the strays and losers
Beggars really can't be choosers
That ain't it, kid. That ain't it, kid

Fised the chassis
How do you do!
Life turned into and
Endless medley of
Gee it had to be you!
Why?

Tits and ass!
Where the cupboard once was bare
Now you knock and someone's there
You have got 'em, hey
Top to bottom, hey

It's a gas!
Just a dash of silicone
Shake your new maracas and you fine!
Tits and ass can change your life
They sure changed mine

Have it all done
Honey, take my word
Grab a cab, c'mon
See the wizard on
Park and Seventy-Third
For

Tits and ass
Orchestra or balcony
What they want is whatcha see
Keep the best of you
Do the rest of you

Pits or class
I have never seen it fail
Debutante or chorus girl or wife

Tits and ass
Yes, tits and ass
Have changed
My
Life!