I was backstage at a festival in Germany
Talking to a cute, fair-skinned brunette
I asked her if she wanted to have a beer and if she liked our set

I noticed that her hair was longer in the back
I figured that's cuz she's Canadian
That's why I was surprised when she told me that she was kinda lesbian

That's when I realized it was Tegan or maybe it was Sara
I'm pretty sure that it was Tegan
Cuz Johnny Sampson said she was the cooler one

I told her that I was a big fan of her band
She asked me if I had a favorite song
I admitted that I never actually heard them but I like k.d. lang

I told her this Jew knows about the Juno's
And how they got robbed three times in a row
And then I asked her if she knew of anyone who's selling pills or blow

That's when I creeped out Tegan or maybe I just pissed her
Off when I asked her if her sister and her had ever had a threesome
Where they both ganged up on one girl, a forgy or a fivesome
Do they think strap-ons are groovy, and had they ever seen the movie
Bound and did they like Jennifer Tilly? Did they like Jennifer Tilly?

Tegan said she preferred Gina Gershon, Angelina Jolie
In the "Gia" movie that was on HBO
And "If These Walls Could Talk" made Sara cry a lot
After that I forgot what she said
That's the problem with Klonopin, so many things I don't remember
But I got a sinking feeling, I think she might be vegan

And I think I creeped out Tegan, I was creeping out on Tegan
I hope it wasn't Sara, cause (Matt) Skiba said she is the cooler one