She was five foot two, about 95 pounds
She was round in the places she’s supposed to be round
You can take that waitress or the blonde over there
But stand back John, that’s the size I wear

Ina neighbourhood bar not too far from here
Me and old John, we were chucking some beers
Friday night about a half past ten
When a block of secretaries came strutting in

The one in the front was a little too tall
The one in the back, she was flat as a wall
But the one in the middle, as cute as could be
The one in the middle was looking at me

Yeah she was five foot two, about 95 pounds
She was round in the places she’s supposed to be round
Now you can take the waitress or the blonde over there
But stand back John, that’s the size I wear

I said ‘do you wanna dance,’ she said ‘yes I do’
We did the two-step shuffle and the jitterbug too
Now John didn’t like it but he was being a friend
He danced with this one and that one and this one again

A slow song came on, we were locked down tight
John said ‘hey buddy, you can’t hog her all night’
Well you’re a mighty big fella but I don’t care
Stand back John, that’s the size I wear

She was five foot two, about 95 pounds
Round in the places she’s supposed to be round
Now you can take the waitress or the blonde over there
But stand back John, that’s the size I wear

Now she was five foot two, about 95 pounds
She was round in the places she’s supposed to be round
Now you can take the waitress or the blonde over there
But stand back John, that’s the size I wear

Hey you’re a mighty big fella but I don’t care
Stand back John, that’s the size I wear

Stand over there John, I’ll be done in just a minute