I am not American,
Though I live in North America
Which is part of the Americas
Which should make me an American

Geographically Canadians,
Are certainly Americans
As are Venisallians,
But not Hawaiians

They're out in the middle of the Ocean
Just like the U.S. Virgin Islands,
Who shoudn't say they are Americans,
Or even Virgins

How could two whole continents,
Lose their name to one Constitute
Where were we when the U.S. went,
And took the word American away?

But to be fair to them,
Their other name options,
Like U.S.A.ers or United Statesians,
Were pretty bad

Still I want to be as American,
As the French are European,
Or those in Antarctica are Antarctican
Even if they're just penguins

That leaves us Canadians as Northern North American,
But Alaska's Norther curse them
We're surrounded by Americans
Americans, Americans!

I just called those U.S.A.ers Americans
A name meant for two continents not just them
For if I said I was American,
People would probably think I came from Maine

Still I think I have a plan,
Let's become Antarctican,
And join up with the penguins
For just like them, we're not American!