C    G     C  F  C

[Verse 1]
                        Dm  
She says not to buy her flowers
G7                  C
   Or big expensive gifts
                        Dm
She says she don't want jewlery
G7                              C
   And she doesn't need another dress
     F
If I want to show her how much I adore her
                       C   G/B   Am
The best way that I've found
      C
Is to make sure when I'm finished
G                          C      G C
   I put that toilet seat down

[Verse 2]
              Dm
We've been to counseling
   G7                              C
To try and see the ways we could improve
         Dm           
This thing between us
              G7                        C          C7
And different ways to show each other "I love you" 
   F
Forget about those getaway vacations
                    C  G/B  Am
To romantic coastal towns
       C
If you want to say "I love you" 
G                             C   C7
   Then put that toilet seat down

[Chorus]
                             F
'Cause in the middle of the night
                   C
It's cold and it's dark
                           G
And when I hear my name in vain
                        C     C7
I know I haven't done my part
                        F
She just wants me to support her
                           C  G/B  Am
And the best way that I've found
          C
Is with a gentle hand and a loving touch
G                          C     G C
   I put that toilet seat down

[Instrumental]
Em  A  D      
F  G  C  G/B Am  
F  G  C  G/B

[Bridge]
  Am
I know it's kind of funny 
        F             
You can teach a little puppy
         C            G             C
But it's very hard to train a grown man
         Am
When I'm all about my business
        F
And the path of least resistance
D                                 G
She's the one that suffers in the end

[Chorus]
                     F
In the middle of the night
                   C
It's cold and it's dark
                           G
And when I hear my name in vain
                        C     C7
I know I haven't done my part
                       F
She just wants me to support her
                           C   G/B  Am  Fm/Ab
And the best way that I've found
          C/G                           
Is with a gentle hand and a loving touch
G                       F
  I put that toilet seat down
Fm    C
Down, down