C
Alright, this is Too Fat To Fly! 
                                                       F
There ain't no wings on a Pachyderm, you're too fat to fly
C                                                         G
There ain't no wings on a barnyard pig, you're too fat to fly
C                                                                  F
And there ain't no wings on your big ass and there ain't no wonder why
C                                               G
If you get on I'm gettin' off, you're too fat to fly

(Chords continue like Verse 1 throughout)

Greyhound will get you there, you're too fat to fly
Bus tires will need extra air, you're too fat to fly
Who sold your big ass a ticket? Let's kiss our ass goodbye
Ol' butterballs gonna crash us all, you're too fat to fly

There's a box car on a circus train, you're too fat to fly
They'll hose ya down if it don't rain, you're too fat to fly
Shovelled out your stall twice today, I pity that poor guy
Them Trapeze studs better grab their nuts, you're too fat to fly

If that don't work, sit on your thumb, you're too fat to fly 
Tell 'em when the Extamp(?) come, you're too fat to fly
Hitchhike to Alabam, big ol' ham with a banjo on your thigh
Till they throw some hay in the cargo bay, you're too fat to fly