A          G             D       C 
I bought a gerbil at the petting zoo
A          G               D     C
If Richard Gere can do it, I can too.
A       G             D        C 
I get undressed and I start to lube
A           G             D          C
I stick the gerbil in the end of the tube.

(strum the pre-chorus)
Bb             A  
Wondering just how he'll feel
        Bb                      A 
will he like it better than his little wheel
Bb               A 
careful now he's right beside me
Bb                C 
one more inch and he's inside me
D  F  D  F      D    F  D  F 
GO!!!    Gerbil go! 

(1st Chorus)
D      F       D      F
Burrow harder, burrow deeper
D     F      D       F 
be my little chimney sweeper
D         F    D   F
one thing I forgot about
C                N/C
how am I supposed to get you out

(back to picking the verse)
   A      G          D    C
so now my gerbils on easy street
A             G                D         C
it's warm and cozy and there's plenty to eat
A         G      D         C 
the situation is beyond my control
A            G             D           C
gotta find a way to get him out of his hole.

(sturm pre-chorus)
Bb               A 
I tried crowbars I tried wires
Bb                      A 
I almost got him with a pair of pliers
Bb                 A 
I tried cheese but he's not biting
Bb                 A 
I wish this wasn't so exciting
D  F  D  F      D    F  D  F 
Go!!!  Gerbil Go!!!

(2nd Chorus) 
D      F    D      F 
Jesus, I am such a sucker
D          F       D    F
Please get out you fury fuuuahhh!
D       F     D      F 
I think I am getting ill
C              N/C
suddenly he's very very still

(back to picking verse)
A            G       D      C
Now it's too late my gerbil died
A             G          D    C 
I guess I have committed gerbacide
A           G      D               C 
here's some advice it's very clear cut
A               G       D             (no C)      A  
if you love your gerbil...don't stick him up your butt

(Continue strumming verse chords)    
don't stick him up your butt
little furry gerbil in your booty hole
don't stick him up your booma whomma wam 
(start babbling to the music,
kind of a scat like singing) (Ha! Scat...um...nevermind)
Yeah!