Just want to fix my make-up
Just want to do my hair
But I can't
And it's because
Myrtle's always there

Her clothes are so outdated
Her complexion is not too great
But even though she's kind of nice
She's just too much to take

So I avoid the bathroom
That's on the second floor
Because that's where you'll find Myrtle
The dead girl who's such a bore

Just want to go in silence
Without a ghostly stare
But I can't
And it's because
Myrtle's always there

Okay, so I'll admit it
Sometimes she's not so bad
A friend who is transparent
Is a useful friend to have

I really love to gossip
And Myrtle knows it all
When we want the latest updates
We ask her to peek through walls

Just want to fix my make-up
Just want to do my hair
But I can't
And it's because
Myrtle's always there

Everyone else hates Myrtle
But we say "O Contraire"
She does things we wouldn't dare
So give that ghost a chance that's fair
Give your thanks and be aware
That Myrtle's always there